Thursday, July 19, 2012

Your Mood is My Mood

Hey Ya'll,
So, last time we talked I was making the life changing decision to stop wishing and just be the person I imagine myself to be. Remember? Or at least that was the posting in a nutshell. Well, I'm realizing something right now; the people you are closest to have a really profound effect on the way you live your life. For example: my husband has been in this incredibly difficult funk lately and it drags down the entire home's environment. He has been harping on what he doesn't like about his job and what he doesn't have in his life that he is neglecting all of the good things that deserve the attention that he has been focusing his anger/discontent on. I love my husband to pieces but I don't think he realizes just how much his mood affects his family directly. I know I have done my venting here but I left it on the pages and took solace in my family because they were the only things that made me happy at the time. But when my husband is in his funk it is hard not to take it personally because he behaves as though he can't stand to be around anyone other than his friends that share the same hobby interests (video games and poker) I know we all need our outlets but somehow it hurts my feelings a bit great deal. I feel as though I'm not enough for him to confide in or find peace in. Oh well, I guess ultimately it's his battle to fight and I just have to learn how to sit on the sidelines until he wins. I guess as long as I continue to focus on becoming the woman I imagined myself to be at this point in my life then all other things will fall into place. At the very least I will be able to say I am who I wanted to be, because that is all I have control over. I cannot fix anyone else's life, I cannot change anyone else's perspective, I cannot force anyone else's joy. Only my own life, perspective, and joy can be changed by me and that is exactly what I'm going to work on. Okay, I feel better. Thank you all for listening/reading once again?
Peace and Namaste Ya'll

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